Successful Relationship and Marriage

Any relationship has its ups and downs , but what makes your work. A lasting relationship does not always signal a happy marriage. Plenty of miserable couples have stayed together for children, religion or other practical reasons. But for many couples, it’s just not enough to stay together.

They want a relationship that is meaningful and satisfying. In short, they want a sustainable marriage. The things that make a marriage last have more to do with communication skills,social support, stress – those are the things that allow it to last or not.

The notion that the best marriages are those that bring satisfaction to the individual may seem counter intuitive. After all, isn’t marriage supposed to be about putting the relationship first?

Not anymore. For centuries, marriage was viewed as an economic and social institution, and the emotional and intellectual needs of the spouses were secondary to the survival of the marriage itself. But in modern relationships, people are looking for a partnership, and they want partners who make their lives more interesting.

Caryl Rusbult, a researcher at Vrije University in Amsterdam who died last January, called it the -Michelangelo effect,- referring to the manner in which close partners -sculpt- each other in ways that help each of them attain valued goals.

Studied of how individuals use a relationship to accumulate knowledge and experiences, a process called -self-expansion.- Research shows that the more self-expansion people experience from their partner, the more committed and satisfied they are in the relationship.

Over time, the personal gains from lasting relationships are often subtle. Having a partner who is funny or creative adds something new to someone who isn’t. A partner who is an active community volunteer creates new social opportunities for a spouse who spends long hours at work.